The Battle Within

I went to bed last night feeling as though I had accomplished a major task. In reality, it wasn't so major at all...it was the simple start of this blog...of sharing my thoughts and ideas about creativity, spirituality and ego. I felt somewhat liberated and extremely fulfilled. I had taken the leap! But, that little voice inside my head wasn't going to give up so easily. After drifting off to sleep, I had a dream where an aquantaince of mine, who happens to also be a potter, came over to my house and spent time with me in my studio. She went on to 'critique' every one of my pots. Would you believe that not a positive word was said? Everything was terrible, worthless, ugly...

(Ah, good effort my friend but you underestimate my strength and ability. I will not be taken down so easily.)

An Imperfect Beginning

The main phrase for the perfectionist is 'not yet'. This is because it's never quite good enough, or ready, or as perfect as the perfectionist has imagined it. The perfectionist is constantly fine tuning, redoing, shaping, polishing, getting ready, adjusting, tinkering...

Perfectionism is what stops many people from sharing their creative dreams, ideas, or reality with others.

Perfectionists have unbelievably high standards to which they compare themselves and their creative dreams. Even a mild case of perfectionism can cause this.

The blessings of perfectionism are that the work is often uncommonly good, if the perfectionist can just get brave or determined enough to share with a sensitive and insightful person.

-SARK, from 'Make Your Creative Dreams Real'

This really spoke to me and it applies to the beginning of this blog as well. For so long I had been meaning to begin but the timing just never seemed quite right. I had been waiting to get further along in my work so I would have more to show, more to speak about; maybe wait a few more months so my little ones would be a bit older and therefore I might have more time to make it better. I told myself I needed to create a great header first, an interesting profile, a coordinating colour scheme...So many excuses, made up of the fear of not being good enough when deep inside, I understand that all it takes is to let go and just do it! Let go of ego and allow the creative spirit inside to flow through. One thing I do know for sure is that once you climb over that wall and begin, the work finds itself and it gets easier and easier as you move along...

So here it is, my imperfect beginning...